Katelyn is almost 4 months old and today has discovered how to roll from her back to her belly. But she doesn't particularly like being on her belly so instead she has chosen to roll her buns over but continue to lay on her arm on her side.. and bam she fell asleep.
... I can't blame her, I'd rather sleep on my side too.
So it the precious moments of her sleep I thought it was long overdue to blog. I have a lot to say I mean its been 3 months..So I may not finish, I may ramble on forever, or I may break this into a few blogs.
First and Foremost.. motherhood..
I have taken care of children since I was a child myself. From the age of 7-17 my family took in over sixty foster children 95% of them under a year old, many we picked up from the hospital just a day or 2 old. (I would love to write some about this ..note to self) I can do diapers, spit up, bottles, crying, carrying in any form or fashion. I loved those babies cared for them, a few are my siblings now, many I miss and remember often. But I was not prepared for motherhood.
Nothing could prepare my soul for the complete and udder love I have for MY child. The amazing feeling and shock of looking at her and knowing half of her came from me, and half from my husband. I can't believe how fast she is growing, but I also feel like she has been with me forever; how could I live my life before her?
Love and happiness is not the only thing I was unprepared for. Nursing was another. I was worried about nursing before; comfort level mostly. I wanted to do it but it seemed weird to put a child "there". The moment I saw her that fear was over. But a whole new one developed. I had supply issues and still she has a formula bottle here and there. Talk about inadequacy issues...The first 2 months of her life I was constantly stressed out and emotional about the amount of liquid coming from my breasts. She has gained well and is healthy though.
My marriage has changed too. I am grateful that we had the time we did before having children. I miss our quality time we use to have. I feel like, no scratch that, I know I don't have enough time for him, much less the house or cat or job. He is a wonderful father. I am blessed to see his love for her, her grins and giggles just to get his attention, and so very grateful for all his help with her, the house, and my emotional stability. I honestly am amazed by his strength and thank God for him everyday.
I am happy to be a mother of such a wonderful baby... I always knew I wanted to be a mommy when I grew up...
This would definetly be too long to write about any other subject so I will try to find some more time to write again soon.
3 comments:
You are a great mom and Zack is a great Dad. I am glad to know you and your baby.
Very sweet. Before you know it she'll be walking and talking.
Girl, I could have written that post myself! I too thought I was ready for a child, and then I birthed one. It was SO different than loving and caring for my brothers and all the other babies in my life. SO different. And as for the marriage... ooooohhh, so get ya. Ours has changed dramatically. Not necessarily bad or good, just so different. I appreciate things I never knew really mattered, about my husband now. And oh how I cherish him. He is my beloved gift from God, and my son too. Both precious gifts from my Father. Never enough time to show them both what they mean to me, never.
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